Brendon is a moron, yes ma’am, gotta have love boy. Man, looks and brawn, some brains for conversation, but obviously only wants boobs in his life. Good for you, this show produced them for you.

I don’t predict who will take BB, never really have. I don’t tend to actually “like” players on it until it’s getting much closer to the end. Liking their bio’s is completely different than liking them after a couple of weeks in the house. Man that house can just break you. But there are always definite people I fucking hate from the beginning. All Rachel had to do was say “HI” and I hated her. Head tilt, fake smile, and fake infliction in the voice. Has no one called her out yet? She’s pretty old not to be told how fake she is. Hilarious thing is that every where I go online they hate her too. I wonder if there has ever been a more hated player on big brother?

Some more blogs and sites are going to be sold off. Dead weight of these sites not being worked on keeps me unproductive as well.

But I’m really missing just posting about random shit here. Movie’s, books, kids, food, whatever. I need to get back here regularly and let it all out. Have a feeling it would help tremendously to do so.

Alas, as far as following the books and even the fun theme of the books, it’s a total fail. BUT, if I hadn’t read the books then it is great. I force myself to ignore the fact that it’s so completely different than the books and just enjoy. I was angry after the first season because they changed so much and didn’t have characters look anything like their descriptions in the book. But season 2 is SO different that I’m having an easier time.

I’m on episode 7, I think of season 2. So far they have thrown a lot of stuff in and taken a ton of artistic liberty with the story. But they have thrown a few of the funny spots in from the book.

I just wish they had stuck to the books more as it’s a very funny series. Usually this much rewriting seems to happen because it needed more action, but this isn’t the case. It hasn’t added more action at all, it added more bloody, vampiric gore than was actually in the books.

I’m now enjoying the True Blood series, but it could screw up at any time. Their choice of actor for Eric sucks and by rewriting his character so much they’ve ruined it for me. Sookie and Eric’s relationship is huge later in the series and them screwing up all this early stuff just sucks. They’ve really done a rewrite of Sam’s character as well. Not for the better. Then, don’t get me started on how they’ve changed her brother The Jason in the tv series is NOTHING like the books.

I better leave it at that. Truly, I like both for different reasons and am enjoying the series. However, I’m going to now reread the stackhouse series because I need a good laugh and they are good for that!

photo credit: NomadicLass

Very few of the 56 deaths couldn’t have been prevented.  Adrenaline junkies wanted to be there and if they hadn’t been there we wouldn’t have the awesome shots and commentary we have.  However, they lost friends that were trying to do the same.  And who could forget the crazy old man Harry Truman who said he’d lived there for over 50 years and was going to die there.  Damn idiot did! Truman of St. Helens : The Man & His Mountain was written by his niece and I’m going to have hubby order it. He was a WWII vet and an old rum runner. You know that guy was a cool grandpa. I have lots of ornery relatives like that I wish I had their stories. lol

Wikipedia has some cool quick facts about the eruption and the mountain itself. I’m having a hard time finding a dvd copy of how the eruption hit us here in Washington state, which is a very sad thing, but a great book to check out is Ecological Responses to the 1980 Eruption of Mount St. Helens. I see a definite need to hit some of these people and tell them to get with the times and upgrade those vhs tapes to dvd!

But on to me.  I was 7.  We were on one of our many weekends over at our best friends house in Brewster, Washington.  It was 8:32 and we kids were out playing in the sunshine already (eastern Washington gets sunshine, lol) and our (probably) hungover parents were inside cooking pancakes and drinking bucket loads of coffee.  It was Sunday morning so that meant we would leave soon to head back to the west side of the mountains as Dad had to get to work.

We heard the mountain blow.  We were somewhere around 200 miles northeast as the crow flies from it.  I will tell you that I told my parents that the mountain blew up.  This isn’t the closest mountain to us by any means, but I told them the mountain blew.  I need to talk to my brother and see what he remembers about the event.  I know I knew the mountain blew.  We couldn’t see it at all.  I just knew.  We were in the middle of the redneck Eastern Washington and they all laughed and said that it was a gunshot.  I knew better.

My parents decided to go the long way home.  The scenic route.  It was one of the few times we went through Leavenworth which is hubby and my favorite, favorite, favorite town to run away to.  I can remember we stopped for breakfast there and the funny thing is it’s the family side of the favorite little dumpy lounge hubby and I like to be at.  We stopped for breakfast, sitting in a big booth in the front corner window and the waitresses were talking to the locals about the mountain blowing up.  It is the one time I can remember for a fact I told my parents, “I TOLD YOU SO!”

Again, this is why I need to talk to my brother about this.  We never have talked about it and we are very in tune with our surroundings, environment, and hey, we just know shit.  It’s true and more of a post than any can handle.  We’re native american and the mountain blew.  Yes, we did know it was her.

By the time we got home it was slow going across the Cascades.  This was an already slow journey.  Thankfully we had gone so far north to get across or we would have been stopped.  My Dad isn’t native but he knows crap too.  I’m sure that is the reason why he drove us so far north.  We could go there too, but eh, not very few of you are ready for that either.

The next morning I should have been going to school, but I remember it didn’t happen.  We did get up in the morning and collect adh off our bumper.  I know we worried for days about Great-grandma because Wapato had been shut down for days.  It was like a horror movie, dark and dusty for days on end.  They were told not to leave their houses and with good reason.  Of course, over the years I’ve seen a ton of footage of the Mt. St. Helen’s blowing up and the aftermath.  So it’s always fresh in my head how the towns so close to me were in complete shut down at the time.

I wouldn’t give up my mountains for anything, but I do have a  healthy respect for them.  I know I live extremely close to active volcanoes.  But dang they are gorgeous!

I had a tremor so bad I would still spill my water glass when holding with two hands. I felt really stupid. The tremor even went so much as a facial tick and if I didn’t pay attention I could feel my teeth chatter slightly. Not cool and it didn’t show up until around 8 weeks into the drug.

Then after researching the side effect I read the pamphlet and saw that it can cause short term memory issues which was my problem with not being able to complete sentences very quickly if at all. And the reason I can’t believe I was prescribed it is it causes sleeplessness. WHAT?!

I was supposed to be getting off the ambien and only taking it when needed. Well when I’ve taken the wellbutrin no matter how early in the day then of course I have to take the sleep aid to get to sleep at all. Cycle of upper-downer. Jeesh

So I’m not really taking either now. I kind of slowly weaned off the wellbutrin, but not as slow as I’m sure I should have. I just couldn’t stand it anymore. I haven’t used one of the ambien’s in a few days either now.

I’m going to look into some more natural alternatives for the mood issues. I told her I wasn’t interested in trying something different. I will keep the ambien prescription for now and use it here and there. But I also know I’ll be tired and hit sleep when it happens. I’m working on creating some better habits.

Then it was off to my seniors fitness class and I knew something was up when more people than normal were there before I opened the doors and were out of their cars talking to each other.  Actually, I knew something was going to be up over the weekend.  One of my seniors passed away unexpectedly.  She’d been sick and they couldn’t find what was wrong.  She only lived another day or two after they figured out her body was filled with cancer.

Her grand-daughter is an actress and I watched 3 movies last week that she was in.  I watched 2 in a row on the lifetime channel on Sat.  I knew that was a sign because I did know she’d been sick and was still in the hospital.  I never watch lifetime and what are the odds of just happening to catch two in a row with her in it?  Those aren’t odds, they were a sign.  Thankfully signs don’t freak me out.

It’s hard to think she won’t be at class anymore.  She was a very fit woman in her mid 80’s.  I’ll remember how she looked at her long time husband as she brought him to class when she first started so that she could get out of the house and visit and exercise.  She loved him so much.  I’ll remember the worry I had after he passed and she didn’t look like she was caring for herself enough.  Then I’ll remember the sparkle when she found another great man and then showed us the ring.

She was a very cool and amazing woman and I will miss her.  I can’t imagine how much her family will as well.  I’ll look forward to telling them how special I think she was when I attend her memorial.

Then he found this stupid show on the History Channel, American Pickers. Gosh Darn it, we’ve already watched a few episodes. Another one started up and I told hubby we were screwed if this dang show was on all day. Checked the guide and it’s only on for another 3 hours. OH NO, it’s a damn marathon. I guess I’m the only one in the family that hasn’t seen it.

But I swear this is so many people in my families old houses that it’s cracking me up. If they went through a lot of the stuff at my parents house they’d find rusty gold.

So now I’m moving to all my blogs and getting posts up. I won’t be cleaning the house until after lunch obviously so I better get some work done online while I sit here. The plan was to not be online, but that’s not happening. Better run with the alternative. Especially since we’ll be back on the History Channel again tonight to watch the first episode of America. I think hubby may be hoping the clouds move in so he has an excuse not to mow.

Crap, now flipping he just found the Sounders game. It’s a tv/couch day for sure.

I’m thinking my body could be trying to adapt to no sleep aid and that funky sleep it’s put me in for the last couple of months. But we’ll see. I’m going to try not to take it for a while. Hubby is on vacation for spring break and I generally sleep better when he’s home.

It’s been a very long day of traveling and visiting with family. But here I am at 10:30pm hitting my blogs and off to comment on others. My daughter says she has to stay up until midnight to text her best friend happy birthday. lol I just put in one of my classics Resident Evil: Apocalypse (yes, it’s an affiliate link). But I just may get up and switch it out for Extinction. Yes, the beauty of being a movie junky is some nights I can’t figure out which one of my favorites to watch.

I need to go comment on some of my favorite blogs before I fall over on the couch. I’m already getting pretty slumped down.

My aunt, Mom and I were on the way home from a meeting (over 2 hour drive each way) and my aunt was talking about how she stays up really late now that she is retired. I brought up how I’m now taking the ambien so I can try to sleep earlier and stay asleep. My aunt was very unhappy I’m taking it and started in about all sorts of other things I needed to be doing. Habit forming stuff. Yes, I know that SOME of my sleep issues come from habits formed. But if I can stay up until 2 or 3am, get up at 6 and sometimes stay up or go back to bed for 1.5 hours and then do it again the next night? If I can do that for over 7 days and not crash? Someone is comparing apples to oranges. This leads me to why I don’t talk about my issues. Everyone has exactly what I am doing wrong and it’s my own fault. K, shut up…I already tuned you out and your mouth is still moving.

This leads me to the title of this post. I knew my Dad always had sleep issues. I’ve tried to pay attention and there is no rhyme or reason to it. But back a few years ago when I’d have a few days of barely any sleep, if I talked to my Dad, he would have had just about the same problem at the same time.

I was trying to explain this to my aunt when my Mom piped in. “You know your Grandma and Great-grandma were always night owls too?” WELL CRAP. I think I remember that Grandma was, but I never put it together. My very cool Great-grandma passed when I was younger so I wouldn’t know she was a night owl. That is 3 generations before me that are “night owls”.

In this day and age we like to label everything with a syndrome or disorder. We’ve moved those that don’t need as much sleep to a new category called “sleep issues”. Previously we just called them night owls.

I’ll be weaning off of the ambien. It doesn’t make me go to sleep but it is keeping me sleeping better through the night. However, I’ve been taking it for almost 2 months now and changed my sleep/wake pattern up drastically. If I don’t take the ambien I will not sleep before midnight and yes I’ll be up before 7am for sure. I’ve been thinking of only taking the ambien on nights that hubby is at work because I can easily stay up all night then.

I’m keeping an eye on everything and I will communicate this family history with my doc when I next meet with her. But I’m leaning towards the sleep not being an issue and I’m forcing something that my body doesn’t want to do naturally. Of course that is my expert and professional opinion. lol

We made mistakes, but not near what everyone is and has gotten away with. We know people that filed bankruptcy over the years and it does tend to make us angry. See we never filed, we paid our bills like we were expected to.

Now while so many are hurting we are thriving, I have to say it feels good. I don’t mean for those that have lost jobs in areas that TRULY don’t have more jobs that you could work if your pride wasn’t in the way. But, I do mean that yes, it feels great to be in the position we worked so hard to put ourselves in. In feels good that we owe so little and can get good credit right now. It feels good that I don’t have to worry about my husbands job right now.

Sure it’s gloating. But damn it, we deserve to gloat after all of these years of doing without, hand-me-downs and fixing cars. I’m so proud of where we are at! I will be honest and say that hubby has most to do with it. He turned everything around a couple of years ago. BUT, I will also say he had the most to make our credit shit. I gave up a few years ago when he wouldn’t stop spending even though I said the money wasn’t there. I have to remember all of that, years of that. It’s not easy for me to do because I don’t hold grudges well unless they are extreme enough for me to never talk to you again. Yeah, thanks Dad. lol But then also thanks because I’m not sure hubby and I could have made it through so many years without my working through so much. Relationships take work and I’m happy to report that even after 20 years, I still passionately want to work through mine